A Sunny Start to Our Holiday
Holidays are often the perfect time to get away from the daily grind and reconnect with yourself and your partner . After a few turbulent years, my husband and I decided to go to Portugal, looking for sun, warmth, and above all, time for each other. However, the preparations were anything but relaxing. Our work kept us busy until the last minute, and our dog, who we adopted a year ago, went to stay with family for the first time for a longer period of time. That was exciting and caused extra stress.
We initially had the urge to plan every detail of our vacation, but eventually decided to leave more room for spontaneity. With full heads and a healthy dose of tiredness, we sat on the plane, ready for a vacation full of relaxation and connection. But how do you really relax and find that connection? Here are some tips and advice to (re)connect with both yourself and your partner during your vacation.
Discuss Each Other's Needs for the Holidays
Before you go on holiday, it is wise to discuss what you most want to experience and what you need. At first, your needs may seem to be miles apart - for example, one person longs for adventure while the other dreams of an oasis of peace. By listening to each other openly and understandingly , you will discover together how you can fulfil these needs. In this way, you lay the foundation for a holiday in which both feel fulfilled. And don't forget, the holiday itself can also bring surprises, so leave room for change and adjustment!
"By really listening to each other, we discovered how we could fulfill each other's wishes and we both enjoyed the holiday."
Letting Go and Disconnecting
Letting go of the hustle and bustle of home is often easier said than done. Take the time to disconnect your mind from your daily routines and stress. Give yourself and your partner the space to land and disconnect at your own pace. You can choose to schedule quiet days at the beginning of your vacation, so that you can slowly acclimatize and really relax after a busy period at home. On the other hand, it can also work well to plan the long excursions or day trips at the beginning of the vacation, when your mind is still busy. This can help to make the transition to a more relaxed state.
"We decided to plan quiet days at first, but noticed that we actually needed action to clear our heads. Only then could we really relax."
Quality Time Apart
It’s also important to give each other time alone. Even on vacation, it can be refreshing to spend some time apart every now and then. This gives you a chance to recharge and process your own thoughts and feelings. Whether you choose a morning alone with a good book, a solo walk in nature, or just sit quietly and do nothing, these moments can help you recharge. When you come together again, you’ll find yourself connecting with your partner with renewed energy and enthusiasm. Spending time together and apart can create a healthy balance and strengthen the bond you share.
"Those mornings alone with my book were wonderful. It made me enjoy our time together more for the rest of the day."
Boredom is Allowed on Vacation
In our busy lives we are constantly busy, both mentally and physically. Especially on holiday, boredom is a luxury that you should allow yourself. Let go of your schedule and give yourself the space to be bored and amazed by the pool or on the beach. Plan enough empty time so that you can reach the point of 'boredom', because that is where real relaxation begins. Enjoy the beauty of your surroundings, such as the dragonfly flying over the water or the rocks along the coast.
“The moments of doing nothing were the most refreshing and relaxing of all.”
Enjoy Physical Contact
Don’t forget to snuggle up! Physical contact is not only good for the emotional bond, it also has a relaxing effect. Think of a cuddle at breakfast, walking hand in hand or snuggling together under a blanket while looking at the stars. Vacation is the perfect time to let romance blossom. Whether it’s a spontaneous kiss, a loving massage or just snuggling up close while watching a movie, physical contact brings you closer together and makes the vacation even more special.
"After a day of adventure, cuddling up on the beach and watching the sunset felt like pure magic. Sometimes it was even better than the sunset itself."
Ask New Questions
Explore new things with your partner by asking new questions. Bring a set of question cards with you on vacation and use them during a romantic dinner or while relaxing by the pool. These unexpected questions can lead to deep conversations and surprising insights into each other. You’d be surprised what you can still learn, even after years together. You might discover that your partner once had a secret passion for dancing, or the story of a hilarious childhood adventure you’d never heard of. These new questions keep your relationship exciting and full of discovery.
"After twenty years together, we discovered by asking new questions that there was still so much we didn't know about each other. It was like we were dating again!"
Limit Screen Time and Do a Digital Detox
Try to keep your screen time to a minimum. Turn off as many notifications as possible if you don’t really need them and leave your phone in your pocket. This will help you be more present in the moment and improve your connection with your partner and the world around you. Without the constant distraction of technology, you can fully immerse yourself in the experience of your holiday. Take it a step further and do a digital detox: try spending a few days without electronics. This will help you to fully relax and really be in the moment with your partner. It’s amazing how both the quality and quantity of your connection increases.
“Without phones we had conversations like we used to, it really brought us closer together.”
Future plans for after the holidays
At the end of your vacation, take time to reflect on your experiences together and discuss new ideas for the future. What were the highlights? What new insights did you gain? Vacation also provides a space to come up with new ideas about what you want for the future. Use this reflection to plan for future adventures and goals. This will not only strengthen your bond, but also give you something to look forward to.
“On our last evening we talked about the highlights of the holiday and already started dreaming about our next trip and new adventures.”
Conclusion
A vacation offers more than just rest; it gives you the chance to truly tune into each other’s needs and dreams. By leaving the hustle and bustle of home behind and taking time for deep conversation and mutual reflection, you can strengthen the intimacy and trust in your relationship. Whether you’re watching the sunrise together, taking a walk without a destination, or enjoying a spontaneous kiss, these moments of connection are priceless. By scheduling time to reflect, ask new questions, and limit screen time, you create space for real conversation and mutual growth. Use this time to make new plans and return with a stronger, more connected relationship. In this way, every vacation becomes an opportunity to grow and thrive together.
Invest in Your Relationship
Would you like to deepen this connection even further? Then consider participating in one of my coaching programs or communication trainings for couples. These programs are designed to help you communicate better, create deeper connections and build a strong, loving relationship. Visit my website for more information and to register. Let's work together towards a happier future!
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